Summer fun!

I have been having bittersweet moments with the twins as of late. On one hand, I'm so excited that we've reached this stage of independence. They don't need me to help them up the ladder at the park. They don't need me to stand at the bottom of the slide, arms outstretched to catch them as they come barreling down at full speed, head first. They sit on the steps when we come home to take off their shoes. They remember to put their cups on the table instead of throwing them on the floor. On the other hand, though, they don't need me to stand at the bottom of the slide...they don't need me to help them up the ladder... I know, I know...I have Meghan and she'll need all of this in no time. But, the E's were my first loves. They're the ones that consumed my heart for two years. They are my babies.






My babies are no longer babies, though. We're venturing into the land of potties and underwear. The Professor has begun announcing that he has to go potty, so we're going to start with him. I know the belief that boys are much harder than girls, but we're going to give it a go, anyway.

We've recently discovered our backyard. Sad, I know. But, you must understand that we live in a large townhouse and in order to get to the backyard, you must go through the basement. Granted, it's a finished basement, but it still creeps me out. It is still covered with the old dark paneling and none of these townhomes were insulated in the basements. So, you have the cinder blocks and firewall, covered by paneling. No drywall, no insulation, nothing. It's cold down there, even in the summer. The fence is falling apart and the neighbor has vines growing all over their side of the fence on the left, so the fence has rotted and has fallen down. We've propped it back up and rigged it as best we can, but it still looks terrible. The concrete slab that serves as a patio is crumbling and has cracked. For some reason, when these homes were built, the concrete was ATTACHED to the foundation of the house. So, as the foundation has settled over the last 30 years, the concrete has cracked and is now slanted down. When it rains, that whole patio is under water and there is moss all over the place. There are no flowers back there. Only a giant azalea bush and some hostas. I've been playing out front with the kids for several months and I hate it because they both run in different directions and I end up yelling because they don't listen. It's not fun for any of us. So, last weekend I went and picked up some outside toys and set up their Kangaroo climber and slide outside. They've got t-ball and other balls, trucks and a few other items. This weekend, I'm picking up a pool and some plants and flowers. We'll do the best we can to make it feel comfy out there for all of us. I enjoy it because I can leave Meghan sleeping in the living room and spend time outside with the kids. Even better? They can't go anywhere so I'm not yelling to come back! We're really enjoying each other lately and I've noticed a huge change in behavior now that we're outside all day.


Meghan is growing by leaps and bounds. I'm sure my MOM friends will have a hard time believing this, but she is 10x more difficult and demanding than the twins ever were. She only sleeps for 2 hours at a time and screams from 6:00pm until 8:00pm every single night. She is inconsolable for that two hour period. We get small moments of reprieve if we take her outside and walk around the cul-de-sac. If she is not being held, she is miserable. If she is not attached to my breast, she is miserable. Even if she's not hungry, she just wants to suck and fall asleep attached to me. I do get a two hour window in the morning from about 9 to 11 or 10 to 12. She'll sleep in her swing while I play outside with the twins. Logistically, it is a nightmare and I'm failing big time trying to get all three of us ready in the morning and get Jason to work. As a result, he is taking the car most days to work and we stay here. If I had a chance to plan this, I would have waited another few years before getting pregnant again. I can't believe I'm saying that, either, since we went through so much just to get pregnant with the twins. Never in a million years did I think I could get pregnant AND sustain a pregnancy on my own. Who knew?!? She is a beautiful baby, though, and has begun smiling and staying awake a little longer in between sleep stretches. I love having this opportunity, despite all the rest, to bond with a single baby. In that regard, it is SO much easier. It's a piece of cake getting one baby ready to go to the doctor, running errands, etc... Mom and I went out on Saturday to do some shopping and I took Meghan. I can't even begin to describe how much easier it was. And the bonding is much stronger with her. I mourn that opportunity with the twins.

I am an eternally blessed woman.